WHAT’S MY
PREFERRED CONFLICT-HANDLING STYLE?
When you disagree with someone, such as a peer at work, how
do you typically respond? Use the following rating scale to record your answers:
1 = Practically never
2 = Once in a great while
3 = Sometimes
4 = Fairly often
5 = Very often
- I
work to come out victorious, no matter what. ___ - I
try to put the needs of others above my own. ___
- I
look for a mutually satisfactory solution. ___
- I
try not to get involved in conflicts. ___
- I
strive to investigate issues thoroughly and jointly. ___
- I
can enjoy a good argument. ___
- I
strive to foster harmony. ___
- I
negotiate to get a portion of what I propose. ___
- I
avoid open discussions of controversial subjects. ___
- I
openly share information with others in resolving disagreements. ___
- I
would rather win than end up compromising. ___
- I
go along with suggestions of others. ___
- I
look for a middle ground to resolve disagreements. ___
- I
keep my true opinions to myself to avoid hard feelings. ___
- I
encourage the open sharing of concerns and issues. ___
- I
am reluctant to admit I am wrong. ___
- I
try to help others avoid losing face in a disagreement. ___
- I
stress the advantages of give-and-take. ___
- I
agree early on, rather than argue about a point. ___
- I
state my position as only one point of view. ___
Research has identified five conflict-handling styles. To
calculate your scores for each of these styles, sum the scores from the 4 questions
(in parentheses below) that relate to each of these 5 styles as directed below:
Competing: (Sum of responses to questions 1, 6, 11, and
16) ____
Collaborating: (Sum of responses to questions 5, 10, 15, and
20) ____
Avoiding: (Sum of responses to questions 4, 9, 14, and
19) ____
Accommodating: (Sum of responses to questions 2, 7, 12, and
17) ____
Compromising: (Sum of responses to questions 3, 8, 13, and
18) ____
Your conflict-handling score within each category will range
from 4 to 20. The category you score highest in is your preferred
conflict-handling style. Your next-highest total is your secondary style. See
pages 190-191 in the textbook as well as the following descriptions:
Competing = A desire to satisfy one’s interests,
regardless of the impact on the other party to the conflict.
Collaborating = Where the parties to a conflict each
desire to satisfy fully the concerns of all parties.
Avoiding = The desire to withdraw from or suppress
the conflict.
Accommodating = Willingness of one party in a
conflict to place the opponent’s interests above his or her own.
Compromising = Where each party to a conflict is
willing to give up something.
Ideally, we should adjust our conflict-handling style to the
situation. For instance, avoidance works well when a conflict is trivial, when
emotions are running high and time is needed to cool them down, or when the
potential disruption from a more assertive action outweighs the benefits of a
resolution. In contrast, competing works well when you need a quick resolution
on important issues where unpopular actions must be taken, or when commitment
by others to your solution is not critical. However, the evidence indicates
that we all have a preferred style for handling conflicts. When “push
comes to shove,” this is the style we tend to rely on. Your score on this
instrument provides you with insight into this preferred style. Use this
information to work against your natural tendencies when the situation requires
a different style.


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